You’ve likely heard of the book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey, but maybe you aren’t ready to commit to reading another book that promises high but fails to deliver.
So, to save you some time, we’ve done the legwork for you and have compiled a list of the 7 habits of highly effective teens that can help your teenager thrive.
1. Be Proactive
Part of the reason teenagers struggle with the transition from childhood to adulthood is that they are expected to be more accountable for their behavior. When they were children, they got used to being told what to do in every aspect of their lives. But as they age and gain more freedom, they may not always use it responsibly.
Successful teens take responsibility not only for their present actions but also for the ones they have yet to make. They know that their current choices impact their future and make decisions with that knowledge in mind.
This can be harder for some teens to accept than for others and may require specialized therapy or structured guidance, such as that offered in programs designed to develop proactive habits.
2. Begin With The End In Mind
One way teens can learn to be more proactive is by identifying where they want to be in 10, 20, and even 30+ years. While still in middle school and high school, it is easy for them to skate by doing the bare minimum and postponing thinking about the future.
But by having clear and concrete goals in mind, those teens will have a much higher likelihood of success compared to those who have vague, undefined aspirations.
If your teen struggles to articulate their goals, they may benefit from activities like vision boards or mentorship programs.
3. Put First Things First
Learning to prioritize is often challenging for teens, as they may not be used to setting their own schedules. Organized parents often fill in a child’s priorities, but it’s crucial for teens to begin taking ownership of this skill.
Encouraging your teen to set their priorities now can prepare them for the future. For example, rather than stepping in to ensure homework is completed before video games, guide them to recognize the long-term benefits of academic success.
4. Think Win-Win
Teens who develop the habit of working toward compromises not only learn to be less selfish but also develop strong leadership skills.
It can be difficult at first for them to learn to compromise, as it is natural to want to get their way, but this skill is valuable for fostering strong relationships and achieving mutually beneficial outcomes.
5. Seek First To Understand, Then To Be Understood
This habit can be especially challenging for teens who, like many others, often believe they’re right about everything.
Effective teens will learn to give and take in conversations. Whether discussing family rules, friendships, or even controversial topics, teens who develop the ability to listen first and express their views second can navigate conflicts more effectively.
Encourage your teen to practice active listening by paraphrasing what they hear before
responding.
6. Synergize
As teens learn to synergize, they will achieve their goals while considering the needs of those around them.
For example, if your teen wants to borrow the car for a night out, this can be an opportunity to teach synergy by having them contribute to car maintenance in exchange. This practice helps them understand that meeting mutual needs is part of responsible decision-making.
The ability to work collaboratively is critical for success in relationships, work environments, and beyond.
7. Sharpen The Saw
The last habit highly effective teens develop is taking time for themselves. Covey highlights the
importance of balancing these four areas:
Physical health
Social and emotional well-being
Mental health
Spiritual growth
Encourage your teen to define these areas for themselves and create specific goals for improvement. For example, physical health could mean joining a sports team or simply going for a daily walk.
If you’d like a more in-depth explanation of these habits, we highly recommend reading Sean Covey’s book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens., or reviewing additional resources like the "7 habits of highly effective teens list" online. These tools can help you and your teen understand and apply these life-changing habits.
By instilling these principles early, your teen can set a foundation for lifelong success.